Shane McCrae

Banjo Yes Receives A Lifetime Achievement Award

 

 

I ain’t no never had to never done

 

No acting not like some of these white boys / Nothing

 

you’ll find in books

 

y’all listen close / Now     and I’ll tell you how I got my name

 

 

 

I worked on     as a young man on a lot

 

What do you think I did I cleaned I fetched

 

Shit and more shit shit both ways shit and took

 

And kept it too yes     and whenever I thought

 

 

 

A white boy might be calling me shit yes / I answered

 

one     morning and I’m just cross-

 

ing from one thing to the next I hear a shout

 

Banjo and so     I lift my head but not

 

 

 

Too high that ain’t my name and I say Yes

 

Back loud but     real polite     and this white boy

 

I never seen before and he’s away

 

Over the other side of the lot but each

 

 

 

Of the white boys there he had a different

 

Important way of standing and no I

 

Ain’t seen this boy before he had his fists

 

Jammed in his hips like all of them but he

 

 

 

Leaned heavy on his left leg like he was

 

Limping standing still     I run quick o-

 

ver to him I say Yes sir tells me to

 

Bend down and wipe this     is the truth it was

 

 

 

A spot of bird shit from his shoe

 

this ain’t     / No kind of story where the nigger says

 

No I bent down and cleaned his shoe

 

I can’t     / From down there see the look on the man’s face

 

 

 

From down there at his feet but just as I

 

Get started     and I think he must have been

 

Smiling he says Is your name Banjo I

 

Say No sir my name’s Bill and he     says Ban

 

 

 

jo suits you better     Banjo Yes     and when

 

I talk to you that’s who you’re gonna be

 

And I say Yes sir sir your shoe is clean

 

Now listen     that boy he was nobody

 

 

 

In fact I never saw that boy again

 

But that name stuck to me

 

and when you see     / A white boy talking on the screen     that’s him

 

And when you see me smiling back that’s me

Banjo Yes Talks About His First White Wife

 

 

Thing is she hated her

 

Father     her mother and her brothers     loved

 

Her cousin but he stopped

 

 

 

Coming around     / After she married me no letters said

 

He didn’t have a phone

 

So every Christmas every birthday every Goddamn

 

 

 

Armistice Day I sent that boy a phone     / She didn’t know I did that

 

but I made sure he knew it was me I sent

 

The same note every time     Don’t

 

 

 

Worry I got a white boy here he answers our

 

Calls see     he wanted that and didn’t want it

 

A nigger     can surround himself with whiteness

 

 

 

But it becomes a wall between him     / And whiteness

 

and he wants and doesn’t want it

Banjo Yes Remembers His First Car

 

 

It wasn’t no

 

Question of did I steal it nobody no cop

 

In some of the towns I drove through never saw

 

A nigger drive alone before     / They were astonished that’s the word for it

 

 

 

In Bakersfield the sheriff followed me

 

from one     / End of the town to the other he had been

 

I guess been waiting for

 

Anything but the circus to pass through

 

 

 

And when he saw the circus coming man     he had to follow it

 

A black man has to be a circus by himself

 

a lion-tamer and a clown

 

A strongman and an acrobat

 

 

 

Money don’t make it     / Stop he gets rich he buys more

 

white folks tickets

biography

SHANE McCRAE is the author of MuleBloodForgiveness ForgivenessThe Animal Too Big to Kill (winner of Persea Books’ 2014 Lexi Rudnitsky/Editor’s Choice Award), and three chapbooks. His poems have appeared, or are forthcoming, in Seattle Review, The Literary Review, LIT and elsewhere, and he has received a Whiting Writer’s Award and a fellowship from the NEA. He teaches at Oberlin College and in the brief-residency MFA program at Spalding University, and is the book editor for BOAAT Press.